Managing Stress for Self-Confidence
At the end of the last posting, “Assertiveness and Outside Influences”, I said that we’d be looking at, managing stress to build up your confidence allowing you to go out of your comfort zone more frequently.
There are seven basic steps to stress management for self-confidence building:
If you prefer, listen to the 4.42 minute AUDIO.
1. Know your stuff
The better prepared you are for any situation the less you will feel threatened by the unexpected.
As a rule people are not frightened of the unknown, rather it is the loss of the known that frightens them.
2. Learn to relax
Even under the most extreme pressure, you need to have strategies to help you relax which you can access at the flick of a finger.
You cannot think clearly, if you feel pressured, so it is important to have these strategies so internalized, cemented by an anchor that you quickly perform, that you simply have to exercise this anchor, and you are instantly in control.
3. Deep breaths
At all times make use of deep, controlled breathing. This needs to be a habit that you put into place all the time.
You have far more important things to think of than how you breathe.
In any case, deep breathing on a regular basis, ensures that you do not have stale, old oxygen sitting in the bottom of your lungs.
Breathing deeply means that you will be exhaling this stale oxygen, and inhaling clean oxygen, which will also give you clarity of thinking.
4. Relaxation of body parts
Just as with deep breathing, it must become automatic to you to sequentially relax your body parts from your head to your toes.
Once again, you can use an anchor, that is, a movement that gives your subconscious mind an instruction to relax body parts.
Obviously, this has to be pre-rehearsed. You will not have time to go through a long procedure to relax body parts, when you have to think on your feet.
5. Eat healthy
You know what you should consume, that is eat and drink, but do you always follow that knowledge?
Are you guilty of having too much caffeine – coffee, tea, chocolate?
Apart from the fact that caffeine is very bad for your bones, although you think it clarifies your mind, it actually does the reverse.
Go off coffee for a week.
After the initial withdrawal, which can take from one hour to two or more days, you will feel how clear your mind now is.
I’m speaking here from personal experience.
About five weeks ago, I stopped drinking coffee.
I have always had boundless energy, and I thought a pretty good mind.
I am amazed at the different type of boundless energy I have, and the difference in my clarity of mind is indescribable.
To begin with, I was not a heavy coffee drinker, maybe two to 3 cups a day and these cups got weaker as the day got longer.
Obviously, you would stay off alcohol, if you had to be assertive or negotiate.
I won’t go into the foods you should eat. I’m sure you know those yourself.
6. No negative mind games
Desist from expressions like:
• I’m nervous
• I always mess this up
• They are so good
• They are so experienced
• And so on
7. Think positive
Visualise yourself as successful. Get a very clear mental picture of you being successful.
Remember to take small and manageable risks in your daily life to push the borders of your comfort zone, so that eventually, your comfort zone expands to the limitless potentiality that you have.
Believe me and trust me, it has worked for me.
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