Assertion Techniques: 9 Verbal Skills – Part 1
Performing well in an encounter is analogous to being an actor.
Everyone needs to plan and rehearse for an encounter which entails having prepared a script to avoid surprises.
This does not mean that you need to rote learn a series of lines, but generic words, behaviours (body language, attitudes, tone of voice), and so on are best rehearsed in advance.
Therefore, I hope that you have really internalized the 7-Step Feedback Sequence of the previous article and will link these with the 9 Verbal Skills.
We have already considered the possible communication styles of ourselves and others in a previous posting, so don’t forget to keep these in mind as well.
Click on the link to hear the 4.17 minute AUDIO.
Here are the 9 Verbal Skills
1. Say ‘No’
• No, sorry. See you tomorrow.
• No, sorry, can’t help you at the moment. I’ll be free, however, in an hour’s time.
• No, sorry, I can’t, but Judy may be able to help you.
• No, I’m sorry, but I feel somewhat uncomfortable with that decision.
• No, I feel I need more time to think about this proposition in the interests of a fair resolution
You get the idea? You have a right to say ‘no’ to either gain more time, or simply to express how you feel.
2. Direct and Dismiss
• Direct: Get to the topic back on track. This is important because people tend to wander and go off-topic. If people get off-topic, the discussion loses momentum and is diluted. Important points gained can be lost.
• Dismiss: If the question is about a product that has broken down, do not mention that it is the cheapest product in the range, focus on the warranty and suggest applying the warranty as the most satisfactory course of action.
3. Question to Prompt Awareness
• Be aware of your own behaviour
• Diplomatically make others aware of their behaviour
It has been said that everyone at some point in time has ADD that is, Awareness Deficit Disorder.
4. Be Reaction-less
This means that whatever the other person is saying and whatever manner or tone they using, do not under any circumstance react negatively.
Keep your cool and keep focused on your pre-prepared course of action.
Always have you ultimate outcome in mind.
The remaining 5 Verbal Skills will be addressed in: Assertion Techniques: 9 Verbal Skills – Part 2.
In the meantime, hone your skills on the existing ones and incorporate them with the 7-Step Feedback Sequence.
Enjoy!
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