Evaluating Your Own Assertive Performance

Posted on February 5th, 2009 by Gloria Hamilten

Whenever you are undertaking a personal development campaign such as developing your assertive skills, it is important to always test and measure performance.

You need to have taken note, for example, of how you had behaved in a similar situation before you started this personal development campaign of improving your assertiveness.

You then have a starting point from which to measure improvement.

With each conscious endeavour at assertiveness, write down how you plan to change tactic so that you can identify that you are being more assertive.

You will then have a yardstick by which to ascertain even small steps in the right direction.
[Read more →]

Share This

Tags: Assertiveness // Add Comment »

Using Assertive Affirmations to Change Behaviour

Posted on January 29th, 2009 by Gloria Hamilten

Using attributes or affirmations is a technique that links positive internal dialogue with visualisations to create a positive self-concept.

Affirmations are a very popular way to alter consistent limiting thought patterns.

A popular method is to have posters with the affirmations in places that you see all the time, and that, although you may stop reading them consciously, your subconscious mind whisks over them and takes them in.

There are many affirmation packs available from experts from all over the world, but it is best to personalise your affirmations, using your own words and therefore owning them.

You can buy these affirmation packs from bookshops and many other stores, but as mentioned, it is preferable to write and create your own.
[Read more →]

Share This

Tags: Assertiveness // Add Comment »

Assertiveness Builds Self-Esteem

Posted on January 22nd, 2009 by Gloria Hamilten

The way you react in certain situations, and the way you communicate is largely dependent on the way you see yourself.

This is your self-concept.

If you have a low self-concept, you believe that others are better than you.

You might also feel incapable of doing a good job, or doing it less effectively than others around you.

These feelings influence the way you assert yourself.

You can hear a feeling of low self-concept in the words you use, and in your body language or nonverbal communication.

People with low self-concepts
[Read more →]

Share This

Tags: Assertiveness // Add Comment »

4 Situations That Require Assertiveness

Posted on January 15th, 2009 by Gloria Hamilten

There many instances in our daily interaction with people when we need to show assertive behaviour and assertive communication practices, however, there are four particular situations in which some people find it difficult to be assertive.

1.    Saying ‘no’

How many times have you been asked to do something and you automatically respond with a ‘yes,’ knowing full well that you really wanted to say ‘no’.

Most people have had this experience on numerous occasions.

Saying ‘no’ needs to be based on sound reasoning, and not just from the standpoint of being contradictory.

There are appropriate ways of saying ‘no’.
[Read more →]

Share This

Tags: Assertiveness // Add Comment »

Giving Assertive Feedback

Posted on January 8th, 2009 by Gloria Hamilten

Before talking about giving feedback, I’d like to briefly touch on Passive behaviour, Passive Aggressive or Submissive behaviour as it is sometimes referred to, because this has relevance when we are discussing feedback.

Not only is assertiveness preferred to aggressiveness, but it is also preferred over being passive aggressive and sidestepping the feedback responsibility.

Both being aggressive and being passive defeat the purpose of the feedback exercise.

People who demonstrate Passive behaviour
[Read more →]

Share This

Tags: Assertiveness // Add Comment »

Assertiveness In Communication

Posted on January 1st, 2009 by Gloria Hamilten

Most of us take communication for granted, using similar phrases and expressions every day, without realizing what a complex process communication really is.

Understanding the communication process means that, you will be sensitive to situations and, therefore improve your assertiveness and minimize being aggressive in your communication, when you need to make a point and be emphatic.

We live in a world it is getting smaller and smaller and yet communication is becoming more difficult.

Why is that?
[Read more →]

Share This

Tags: Assertiveness // Add Comment »

Simple Transformational Questions to ask Yourself

Posted on November 1st, 2008 by Gloria Hamilten

Are you contented with life, the way things are?

Or do you aspire to greater things in your life?

Do you feel that you are living to your full potential?

Do you want deeper and more meaningful relationships with friends, co-workers, with your partner?

We all have challenges but these should not hinder you from becoming all you can be.

Aspirations and dreams you had as a child should continue to live within you and be given importance.

When was the last time you sat down and asked yourself the following questions?
[Read more →]

Share This

Tags: Personal Coaching, Personal Development Growth // 4 Comments »

Using Humour in Your Communication

Posted on October 26th, 2008 by Gloria Hamilten

Do you consciously try to de-stress and relax in your busy day?

What do you do to de-stress?

In your communication with people, do you always use serious words and speak in a serious manner?

Are you mostly serious?  When people laugh at something you are talking about, do you say to them: Don’t laugh, this is a serious matter?

It is really interesting to observe people go through their daily life when faced with vein-popping stress.

Some people use a quick meditation to instantly de-stress.
 
Other people go to yoga during their work day.
 
BUT, how much is humour a part of your communication system?
[Read more →]

Share This

Tags: Humour // Add Comment »

Personal Development: Anxiety as an Ally

Posted on October 7th, 2008 by Gloria Hamilten

This is rather an odd title, isn’t it?

We are told that anxiety is an extreme condition which leads to major and potentially fatal medical conditions.

However, every word in any language has a continuum with landmark points from weak, through to moderate, to strong, then very strong.

Imagine a horizontal line and place these landmarks an equal distance apart and write these landmark descriptors.

You will see that about half of the power of the word ‘anxiety’ is in the weak to moderate range, and that is the ‘anxiety’ I am referring to here; some people may call it part of the ‘stress’ family.

A part of your brain is called the anterior insula, whose role is to alert you of potential harm by making you anxious and, based on past experiences, gives you strategies to avoid this potential harm.
[Read more →]

Share This

Tags: Attitude // Add Comment »

When is change not necessary in your personal life?

Posted on October 1st, 2008 by Gloria Hamilten

Research suggests that not all personal change efforts are successful. 

There is a wealth of information available on how and why people could not make changes in their personal lives.
 
Is it possible to change whenever the situation demands? 

How can you rationally judge all the changes that you may want to make?

There are reasons why some people do not make certain changes in their personal lives.
[Read more →]

Share This

Tags: Change // Add Comment »

Next Page »